Pfffffft

Very tired today. Sleep doesn't seem to be my friend at the moment. Lots of things coming up. Wedding, standup set, few gigs, Film Tube, book stuff. Really don't feel like writing today. Later maybe. Wonder if it will rain again today?

Some Words In Regard To "Demise Of Green People, Demise Of Spiritual Honesty"

This speel is in reference to a blog post I wrote on the 7/6/11, and is for a few people. I would post it to you directly but I have no idea who you are.

Ok, I'm not sure whether this is the wisest thing to do or not, but since it was my words on here which caused harm perhaps these following ones should be posted here as well.

What I expressed in the "Demise Of Green People, Demise Of Spiritual Honesty" is not an expression of ridicule or negativity towards protestants, the faith or the people that were at the said ceremony. Infact everyone there was heart warming, including the person leading the congregation.

I was surprised at my own feelings during the ceremony in question, and the two elements I mentioned really made me question allot of things, not however the meaning of the ceremony. The fact though I "wished" for a draconian cult leader as well as posting a picture of Robert Mitchum's Harry Powell from Night of the Hunter (a fake preacher, con artist and murderer) would put across the fact I have no idea what I would have preferred instead.

Still, I realise my words have brought sadness to some people and difficulties for which I am truly sorry. What I write and draw is exaggerated, the line between making a point using half fiction and real life is one I walk with these words and images... and in this case I have well and truly tripped over that line. This incident has really made me consider that further, and that fact will stick with me the rest of my life.

This message will not undo any damage, but I still thought it best to write these words.

What A Lovely Day

Today was a lovely day. The sun shined. Sandbar got lovely golden chairs. They are so nice. I talked to some people. They were funny and made me smile. They are so lovely.

I had a lemonade today. That was lovely too. I had two, but don't tell anyone! LOL

I drew some pictures. One was a ball. It was red. I like red. It is lovely.

I feel very happy today, I can't wait to see if tomorrow is lovely too. I might even go to bed right now so it comes quicker!

Bye, bye!

The Perils Of Blogging

Who the hell reads this anyhow?

Demise Of Green People, Demise Of Spiritual Honesty

The dancers had tapped their twinkle toes across the floor for the last time, the poets had rambled their last twisted story, the video artists had exhibited their last explosion of imagery... the greenroom closes it's doors for the last time.

Greenroom, for those who are aren't familiar with Manchester or the venue in question, is... or rather was... a theatre which showcased a range of conceptual performances, video art and workshops. However, with the cuts to the Art Council, greenroom received no funding resulting in where I found myself on Saturday... the Big Fat End Party.

Bulging to capacity, greenroom was rammed with artists, media types and anyone who had some connection to it over it's 28 year history. There was booze, anecdotes and speeches with an army of brave smiles in the background.

Attempting to make my way through the crowds whilst responding to artists requests for information / beratings for not getting back to them it was hard not to reflect on a space which had shaped me for nearly a decade. Greenroom had been the first place I had exhibited, the first place I showed one of my films, the first theatre I had performed in, the first theatre show I had hosted.

Many there were probably feeling the same sentiment, and each of us were probably trying to find strength in the thought we will make sure it's not the last time we fumble through those actions. Goodbye greenroom, you did good.

Apart from the demise of a friend there was a religious ceremony I was part of this week . Religion isn't particular important, or even a factor, in my life. I'm not an atheist, I just don't know really. I've met some people representing religion in my life who I thought were amazing, I've met others who... well, were really not. Kinda like the police!

Anyhow, it was important to some people I know... so I thought "What the Hell, what's the worse that could happen?" It wasn't until the ceremony came about that I realised how adverse I was to it. Oh, by the way it wasn't a wedding. Yes, that's right ladies... I'm still free to disappoint you.

The church was taking that angle of "We're cool, we know the world has changed, we aren't trying to force you to say anything or agree to anything you don't believe in". I talked to the head chap before the ceremony about the vows I had to go through and the words I had to say... my brain just came up with justifications to agree and go along with it.

The ceremony began in a quite confused fashion. Hymns were sung which people didn't really know and words were repeated from a prayer book in a monotonal fashion... but, I couldn't do it.

My brain had some time to process the words with the tiny moral man in my heart regarding my vows but these words about god... it didn't have the time to do it as it was here and now leaving the little moral man to sulk and sneer "No".

Surely that was ok though? The religious chap had even said at the beginning of the ceremony to the congregation that if you are of a different religion or didn't feel that the words were for you then there was no problem in saying them... well, it was like that at first.

After the first section of prays (with not much participation) he went back on it in such a weird 'English' way. Repeating his speel about not HAVING to participate he capped it off with something else instead. Reminding us all that we were invited there by our friends to be there on a very, very special day he then said that we COULD (again, he wasn't TELLING us) but we COULD say the pray words for them.

And it worked. I still couldn't go along with it but his approach definitely raised the level of participation. My uncomfortableness quickly turned to anger with acidic bile attempting to force it's way up my esophagus. I guess some church people will never get rid of it's most useful tool... guilt.

He tried it again later, using the picture of a dead woman who tragically died during childbirth (I'm not TELLING you to receive a blessing and light a candle but you COULD receive a blessing and light a candle for her) but I made it though it without vomiting. I said my vows, had some cake, and wished goodbye to everyone.

That passive / aggressive, guilt inducing approach he used... it makes me mad now still. I half wish we had just used some crazy, draconian cult leader to shout at us instead saying if we don't shut up and nod our heads in agreement we'll burn in Evil Narnia or worse. At least that would have been a bit more honest. In a weird way that is.

Like this guy, maybe.

_______________________

More Words added on the 9/6/11:


Ok, I'm not sure whether this is the wisest thing to do or not, but since it was my words on here which caused harm perhaps these following ones should be posted here as well.

What I expressed in the later part of this blog is not an expression of ridicule or negativity towards protestants, the faith or the people that were at the said ceremony. Infact everyone there was heart warming, including the person leading the congregation.

I was surprised at my own feelings during the ceremony in question, and the two elements I mentioned really made me question allot of things, not however the meaning of the ceremony. The fact though I "wished" for a draconian cult leader as well as posting a picture of Robert Mitchum's Harry Powell from Night of the Hunter (a fake preacher, con artist and murderer) would put across the fact I have no idea what I would have preferred instead.

Still, I realise my words have brought sadness to some people and difficulties for which I am truely sorry. What I write and draw is exaggerated, the line between making a point using half fiction and real life is one I walk with these words and images... and in this case I have well and truly tripped over that line. This incident has really made me consider that further, and that fact will stick with me the rest of my life.

This message will not undo any damage, but I still thought it best to write these words.

Summer Girls and The Friendly Revolution

Wine. Red wine. Free Red Wine. How can something be so glorious yet so devastating?

The sun is out, the pavement is too bright and that strange itch has begun to occur to obtain that fictional avatar of desire so accurately refereed to by Bernard Black as "The Summer Girlfriend".

In all honestly, I don't really care to be with anyone at the moment and I'm not at the point where desperation takes over and I start rubbing myself up against anything (animate or inanimate) that can take my weight but seeing all these smiling women walking around in polka dot dresses with flowers in their hair just makes me want to grab one, eat strawberries, skip through fields, have romantic polite kisses then "dump her in Autumn".... or perhaps the heat is just making me a bit horny.

Aside from misguided lust, the last couple of days have been quite fun and productive. A couple of gigs in the form of MC improv night Freestyle Fictionary and acoustic night SBH: Live have impressed me, a few more drawings done (will scan soon!) but the most poignant event was meeting the people at Open Space... which brings me back to the free red wine.

I was having a couple of pints with an experienced cartoonist and illustrator I know and asked whether he could have a look at my work for some feedback to which he ended up inviting me to what I thought was a drawing workshop / crit group.

But it wasn't.

I arrived at a studio with desks and computers with a table full of wine and nuts. It was a hot, humid day and I was wearing a jacket like a fool. Sweating and confussed, I stuck a name tag on my chest with the simple name "Dom" written on it.

Over the few hours I was there I quickly gleamed what the meeting was. It wasn't a crit group, it was a networking event hosted by the co-operative Open Space. In the past I have been very skeptical about hardcore networkers and networking social events... when I was more entrenched in the art world (and film for that matter) I saw alot of this with all it's lies, ego and blag.

However, this was different. There was so many people there from different backgrounds with different aspirations. From high end business consultants and biologists to political activists and illustrators, it was astounding. Each person quickly introduced themselves and without fuss pretty much laid out what type of people and resources they needed to continue a project as well as what they themselves could offer others.

By the end of the evening I was not only meeting people who could easily enrich the projects I'm involved in but also, with my own resources and contacts, I was doing the same for others. I just wish I had more time as there was so many people I wanted to talk to.

And here lies the difference, I believe, between the crass networking I have experienced in the past and what I experienced at Open Space. Not only did it cut through the 'social guff' and had people spell out straight away the score with themselves but also it wasn't selfish. People were there looking for help as well as offering help.

Things are changing bit by bit as they naturally do. Hardly anyone has just one 9 - 5 job, debts are now just another tax that you will never see the end of, with the internet and technology people choose their own entertainment and news and it seems to be getting more common place for even the most unlikely of businesses and people to have this co-operative approach (not everyone...). Perhaps I'm wrong, perhaps these factors are just within my circles or this area. However, if these are growing trends I will be very interested to see how everything develops over the next few years.

Ok, better get on with life as well as sort out stuff for my next Film Tube night. If there's any fans out there it's on Tuesday the 14th of June with the theme of 'Superheroes and Bastards'. Yes, I know... it sounds awesome.

Oh, and to all those summer girls, if you want to apply to be my Summer Girlfriend just follow this link "and await further instructions".

It's a girl... as she has eyelashes...

I think I've got into tea quite a bit now during my detox. Which is a good job since I was hit with my bar tab today. The slap in the face was pretty hefty, but the funny thing was that it didn't floor me. Perhaps with the amount of shake ups, craziness and horror I've encountered within my adequate cushy western life it takes more to shake me up now. Is this growing up?

Shit. Then again, Peter Pan was an annoying little bugger so perhaps this is for the best. Plus not want to grow up can have dire effects as you can see to my right.

Another thing of note is my dear friend, Mr Pete Kennedy of Puppetual Motion has started a blog. I've known Pete for years due to his quite awesome puppet show, the guy used to perform new material at each and everyone of my cabaret nights so you have to give credit to the chap. Swing over and have a peek.

So, sipping my tea getting mentally prepared for tonights gig my mind and pen wandered. I thought about a conversation I had a few days ago with a girl who was peeking at me doodling in my notebook. She pointed at one of the faces I had drawn and asked "Who's he?"

"No-one, I just make up faces. It's a girl by the way"

"But where's the eyelashes?"

Now, it wasn't a very good drawing, but at the same time this is one of my biggest drawing pet hates. Eyelashes. Because of cartoons like the Beano and whatnot we have it ingrained into us like a code that a female cartoon should have those terrible lines stretching from it's face. I say code because that's what it is. Look at this picture:

Ok... I wrote this before I looked for the damn picture and I can't find it ANYWHERE. It's a cubism picture entitled "Mother and child". I even went through the entire online catalogue of the Picasso museum in Barcelona where I saw it. So, suspended your disbelief, pretend you saw it and carry on reading. As I can't be bothered re-writing any of this now.

What do you see? Ok, once you have decided click at this link for the description.

Did you get it right? You probably did, and the beautiful thing about it is that it looks nothing like what it is intended to be apart from the basic aspects. I adore this very basic parameters that our brain can engage in to make sense of a picture. However, this eyelash foolery I say no. These are silly, daft techniques just drummed into us.

Did the disbelief work? No, go away.

Ok, well rant over. I have a gig to sort out and I think I have a blind date soon so I have to do some research in new, inexplicable ways I can screw it up. Oh, and another cup of tea I think.

Alot of tea, caricatures and Minecraftery

So today was Drink 'N' Draw, and fool be me I had promised to host the thing due to the organiser's absence.

Not that this requires much work, as it's more a drop in society meeting than a workshop, but it meant I had to move and interrupt my detox from Friday's events.

About twelve-ish people swung in whilst I smiled over my tea (you will not believe how many cups of tea I've had). They all seemed to get along so a busied myself with a (un)friendly challenge a friend set me.

I hate doing caricatures, and he knows this. Son of a bitch. There are several reasons I hate them:

• My drawings are grotesque, monsters even. And whether I want to or not I always end up taming my drawings of people I know because of this. I didn't always, infact I still have a picture of a girl from university that she has NEVER seen. I think it's fine, but people who know her say she'd be quite upset. Personally I think there's nothing wrong with sharing the same features and personality as a horse. it can in some ways be... elegant?

• It's really hard. If you are making up something no-one has anything to compare it to so even if you make a mistake (and I like making mistakes) no-ones going to be going "Muh, muh, muh... that's wrong". With a caricature there is a right and wrong.

• They take me a long time to do, well in comparison to my stickmen and monsters.

But he challenged me, sending me a blog of an illustrator who does drawings of his friends on facebook. And you know what? That fellow's work was pretty basic. So I took up the challenge. Like an idiot.




And yeah... even though I'm crap at it I did a couple more. In all honesty I think I will do a few more, practice and what not. Perhaps it'll go somewhere.

I sat there drinking my pot of slightly warm tea quite happily for a while, the Friday flashbacks finally subsiding. A woman offered to bring some bread in for me next week (fancy bread too) and I played flirt yo-yo heads with a girl sat by herself so all in all it wasn't a bad Drink N Draw for me.

More tea. Internettering. Lame apologies. Good music. I am now rested. Until I decide to try and play Minecraft, a skeleton breaks into my mud hut while I'm sleeping and kills me.


I tried to get back in my crappy mud hut but all I had to fend myself with was a piece of dirt. I hate you skeleton. Until next time.

The State Of Play

What a horrible day. Can't really blame anyone except myself. Zeus damn it, drinking Irish Car Bombs with scientists was not a wise idea. Neither was asking the same girl out 5 times a good one either.

At the same time I had quite a few ideas for stickman strips. Some a bit naff but there were a couple of gems. A couple of which will be good for my book. As I sat in the bar sipping a lemonade that tasted of air, I wondered about a couple of concerns.

First, why do I only think of stickman strips in the face of struggle, misery and strife? It's a common thing amongst many people who create... erm... we'll say "things" which encompasses everything say... and it's not really a question I dwell upon. But with that in mind, my second ponder disturbed me.

The context of my book is that of relationships. Now, with my current sketch books there's alot of focus upon this aspect to my life. Either that of contemplation of past events or daft things occurring now, and one thing that seems evident is I seem to be in more of those curious situations more and more to the point I wonder whether I'm purposely putting myself there for more material.

Which brings me back to me mainly create work in times of strife and misery... if I'm purposely putting myself into these scenarios am I looking for situations (or creating situations) which are negative for the sake of being prolific?

I think I need to get this book done quickly.

Time to get things rolling...

So, hello I guess. I'm Dom Harbot. I draw things and do other things sometimes. I drink and walk around Manchester. Sometimes I draw properly, sometimes I draw stickmen of stupid things that happen.

I've been failing to get a website for a number of years and this will have to do for now, I guess. I'll be posting here and there about developments in a couple of projects, the main one being "I don't fancy you, I don't want to sleep with you" - a stickman book about love, sex, relationships and rejection. Some of it may be funny.

Anyhow, I am incredibly hung over with flakes of guilt and shame all over me. So until next time, go away.